As you all know, Father’s Day is just around the corner and I am going to take a bloggy moment to revere and laud my wonderful husband, a public statement of my gratitude and love if you will. My husband is a keeper. However, if it hadn’t been cemented after 14 years of marriage, this past weekend proved that there is always something new to learn about your spouse.
My husband…who for this entry I have entitled as…The Blade (read on) is not a big outdoorsman. His definition of “roughing” it is flying coach and forgetting his toothbrush at the Hilton. Actually, lodging at the Hilton is probably “slumming” because he is a loyal Marriott patron.
He is not big into pets (bad for the kids who desperately want a dog), and doesn’t really love sports (great for me). Our second date occurred on Superbowl Sunday; we were the only ones in the restaurant and still couldn’t get good service. He’s not big into skiiing, gardening, planting, nature, or heat unless he’s soaking it up on some tropical island. He even succumbed to watching, Sex and the City 2 with me. I mean, even most women didn’t want to watch that one.
My husband…The Blade, frequently travels. He leaves notes by the kid’s bedroom doors if he has an early flight and they are still sleeping and makes a concerted effort to call them throughout the day. When he’s home he volunteers in their school and extracurricular activities.
We’re Like Coffee and Creamer
I would have to say we balance each other out like…coffee and creamer. If there is puking child, he strips the bed and washes the sheets, scrapes it off the carpet, sofa and/or bed while I tend to the crying, stinky and most hysterical kid. When the kids had lice, he bought the shampoo, washed the first load of sheets, vacuumed and actually did the first treatment because I WAS SO UTTERLY GROSSED OUT by the whole thing. When I realized I had lice too, well, he had already gone on a business trip…UGH! I eventually had to finish the job. He rises to the challenge right away…and waits for me to come along. He is mayor of preventive measures, while I am the designated blood/stitches/hospital appointee. It works for us.
Foreshadowing-How he became...The Blade
Nevertheless, here is the true mark of a man who steps out of his comfort zone to bring harmony and tranquility to his anxious brood. This past weekend, he suggested to the kids that they get their bathing suits on so he could spray them while he watered the lawn. As they were changing into their suits, he noticed something hanging out of the air conditioner compressor. At closer inspection, he realized it was a dead snake. It unfortunately had met its demise in a failed pursuit of a mouse living at the bottom. The Blade (do you hear foreshadowing music yet?) knew how much I utterly despised snakes (even more than lice), and that it would completely traumatize the 6 year-old and the vegetarian, animal loving 10 year old. Moreover, if it continued to decompose in the compressor, the compressor would probably break down on that blistering hot day.
Ah, Life can be Cruel
So….what’s an anti-camping, non-outdoorsman, bug hating, manly man to do? Well, at first, he simply tried to remove the snake. Ah, but life is crueler and far more complicated than that because the snake was stuck, jammed, and the only way to get it out would be to remove the entire compressor…which really should be left to the professionals. Unfortunately, there were no professionals around on a weekend. The Blade…had to take matters into his own hands to protect his children and wife from a gruesome sight. He managed to “remove” the dangling half, but not the rest.
The Blade is still suffering from Post Traumatic Snake Disorder. He wakes up in a cold sweat, lamenting the grisliness of it all and the fact that he is affected by it only makes me love him more. It is positively endearing to me that he did something so out of his realm to shield his children and admittedly neurotic spouse from a most creepy sight.
A Unique Gift
So, what do you buy a man who performs such steely acts of bravery? A wallet? A tie? A mug? Therapy? These all seem so mundane and un-befitting to a man who unleashed his manly prowess. No, I will not insult my husband with such triviality. Instead, I will publicly express my undying appreciation and love out to the blog-o-sphere where it will live to infinity in some computer memory bank, chip or satellite. It will outlive the tie (which will eventually fray) the mug, (that will undoubtedly crack), the wallet (that will eventually fall apart). No, this gift of admission is a permanent testament that cannot be disclaimed renounced or erased.
So, Happy Father’s Day to a man whom I love and adore and without question is an awesome dad and snake remover!